In a recent newsletter Dr. Joe Vitale challenged me in an attractive advertisement with the following comment: "You are either a) attracting wealth, or b) attracting poverty. There is no C option." So I clicked on his link to determine whether I was in the A or B category and hopefully prove that there is a C. Having been raised in a fundamental Christian environment and having spent my life since pursuing all soughts of spiritual values, I was not surprised to discover that I fitted the "A" category. What I was surprised to discover was how angry I am about money. As I worked through the survey I felt the anger welling up inside me at the challenges about my attitudes towards "wealth", "success" and "abundance".
My journey has brought me to the belief that the material world is largely an illusion that, as spiritual beings, we dabble in to have the kinds of experiences that we cannot have outside of this world of opposites and contrasts. So I had to ask myself - if money is only an illusion, why am I so angry about it? I have spent my life consciously ignoring the idea of money as being a significant issue. Working in not-for-profit organisations, often for a salary that was far less than the effort, time and experience that I brought to the job. But I was determined to follow my passion and ignore the issue of my wallet. After completing the survey it became evident that to me, money was not an illusion. If it were I would not feel so angry.
I have done this in my life before, thinking that if I ignore an issue that I consider unspiritual or detrimental to my spiritual journey that I am "transcending" it. But the old adage returns to haunt me - "what we resist persists". My very resistance to the idea of money indicated that money is a problem in my life, not through my over-attachment to it, but through my rejection and adversion to it. Different sides of the same coin.
As I reflected on my aversion to the mighty dollar, I realised the true source of my pain-generating anger. Measurement of my personal worth. Why is my success in the world measured by it's dollar equivalent? The same may be said for the ideas of abundance and wealth. I realise now that I have felt "measured" by my ability to produce a dollar for most of my life. The jobs generally aspired to in my circle of society have big incomes attached. Being succesful is reflected by assets, annual salary and overseas holidays. I have none of these. Does this mean I'm unsuccesful? Does it mean I am living (and thinking) in scarcity? I am angry with money because it is the measure by which my personal value and worth as a human being appears to be judged.
Here is the illusion! The real or perceived judgement of others. The measurement of my value and worth against any scale that exists in my head or anyone elses. As I step outside this mortal world and raise my consciousness to higher spiritual values, I am convinced that each one of us are born with intrinsic value and worth - not just a human beings but also as devine spiritual beings who exist beyond judgement and fault. As we incarnate into these human bodies we often forget our true beauty, our true divinity, our true nature and get lost in a world of competition, fear, and the struggle of life and death. If we can just momentarily shift our consciousness out of the illusion into our spirit-selves we can be reminded that we are devine, that our value and worth is greater than we can imagine and that the universe is a playground of abudance in which there is no lack, no void nor emptiness. The experience of poverty is as rich and valuable as the experience of financial wealth. That without judgement I can experience and accept both ends of the spectrum just for what they are - an experience of poverty or an experience of wealth recognising that neither are a reflection of anything more than the experience.
Phew! I think I found my "C" option.
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